His smile may be heaven-sent, but the thoughts he conjures in our sinful minds could send us straight to hell.
The new vicar at St. Luke’s church is getting us all hot under the starchy, black & white collar. His name is Reverend Doctor Matt Davis, or as we like to call him: Father YummyPants.
We haven’t been this drawn to confessional since the advent of Fleabag, Season Two, in which Andrew Scott answered our prayers as a hot priest for the ages. Scott’s onscreen character and the real-life Reverend Davis both hail from Ireland, yet flash their pearly whites in England.
Matt Davis was born in Northern Ireland, was ordained in Liverpool, and now presides over the nearby flock in Formby. Is this an example of cultural harmony or divine intervention? Who the he– heck cares? We’re just thankful for the bounty of butterflies these hunky men of god have given us. We were so inspired by the Formby Bubble viral article that we went in search of our own spiritual guides on social media… and found plenty of angelic devils as a result.
Exhibit YAY: here’s a bearded man-oh-man of the cloth grooving with an adorable baby on TikTok. The daddy deacon manages to multitask, making the sign of the cross on the infant as they sway. Pardon us, cherubic child – may we have the next dance?
As we sashay over to Instagram, the #HotPriest hashtag is dominated by the aforementioned Andrew Scott (naturally)…
…not to mention a throwback reminder of how scrumptious Kenneth Branagh was in the 1998 film The Proposition.
But we also stumbled upon a #HotRabbi officiating a wedding…
…as well as a few more scruffy shepherds assembled within the #PriestsOfInstagram hashtag.
This #SexyRabbi peered into our souls with those celestial blue eyes…
…and the men of an Italian #SexyPriestCalendar really lit our votive candles.
The moral of this morality play is that we are all God’s creatures, but some of us were lucky enough to be born gay. Don’t get jealous, just join hands and pray that in your next incarnation, you may be the rosary beads dangling against the beefy chest of a #HotPriest. Amen.
Last modified: September 23, 2020