Gay Weatherman Fired for Sharing Nudes with Large Penis Support Group

It’s tough to be well endowed. The stigma, the back pain, the meat sweats – it’s all too much!

Luckily, there’s a system to lift you up when you’re packin’ extra pipe. No, we’re not referring to jock straps; we’re talking about LPSG, the Large Penis Support Group. This squad of sensitive souls is there for each other through the hard times.

Um, we mean difficult times.

Unfortunately, LPSG has an issue with anonymity, because one of its members (pause for innuendo to land) just got outed like a bulge through a faulty zipper.

Erick Adame generously shared pics of his babymaker via video chat, according to a report by The Daily Beast. Speaking of beasts, screenshots of Adame’s massive package were delivered to his bosses and even to his own mother.

Ew, to the max.

The manly meteorologist was subsequently fired, prompting him to issue an apology via Instagram.

“Despite being a public figure and being on television in the biggest market in the country in front of millions of people five days a week for more than a decade and a half, I secretly appeared on an adult webcam website. On this site, I acted out my compulsive behaviors, while at home, by performing on camera for other men. It was 100% consensual on both of our parts. I wasn’t paid for this, and it was absurd of me to think I could keep this private. Nonetheless, my employer found out and I was suspended and then terminated.”

Alchemizing triumph from tragedy, Adame pivoted to future employers, arguing, “Please judge me on the hundreds, thousands of hours of television that I am so proud of and that my employers have always commended me for, and not the couple of minutes of salacious video that is probably going to soon define me in our ‘click-bait’ culture.”

It takes a big man to accept responsibility for his shortcomings, but there’s one facet of the scandal from which the weatherman refuses to shy away: his orientation.

“Let me be clear about something: I don’t apologize for being openly gay or for being sex-positive—those are gifts and I have no shame about them.”

Bravo, Erick Adame. We look forward to your next endeavor, whenever and wherever it may pop up.