Happy Valentine’s Gay!

If you’re looking for a V-Day gift that says, “I’m here, I’m queer, I’m scouring Instagram for the perfect sentiment,” then we’re here to help! Actually, we were momentarily sidelined by thirst-quenching #GayValentine posts from a year ago…

…but NOW we’re here to help! One of our fave out-and-proud outlets is a company called SinQueerlyYours. They can charm the pants off your significant other, revealing the gender fluid skivvies underneath.

Get psychedelic with your pspecial psomeone (that’s our groovy way of spelling “special someone” – you’re welcome). Attain Zen weirdness with hallucinogenic rainbow cards, courtesy of Ash + Chess. Their trippy art will send your love soaring to new heights alongside a unicorn that’ll make you truly horny.

Now that we are cutting to the chase, express yourself with raunchy transparency. The folks at Silly Goose Cards are unleashing Valentine’s fairy tales with a capital FAIRY. The following selection is perfect for a longtime companion or a good-natured boudoir partner who appreciates your frank fierceness.

Talk about a hole in fun!

Let’s cleanse our naughty palates with a multicolored sorbet from Slow Loris Goods. Their tactile constructions weave a wondrous spell, one thread at a time, connecting you and your lover ever closer. Pardon the pun, but these cards will definitely pull at your heartstrings.

If you really want to push the envelope, think beyond the card, courtesy of Little Rainbow Paper Co. Their array of pins and collectibles allow you to wear your same-sex devotion on your sleeve and share your feelings with every-damn-one!

Personalize your passion with some stylish assistance from Hey Guncle. Etsy entrepreneur Michael Taylor can immortalize your love just in time for Valentine’s Day.

Be sure to give yourself enough time to design/order/deliver the perfect keepsake. Speaking of which, we gotta go; mimosas and man-on-man friskiness await. Happy VD, y’all!