12 LOL-Worthy Quotes from “Drag Race” Season 11 Episode 9 “L.A.D.P.”

Plastique Tiara courtesy VH1

Though the library was open, this season’s queens seemed a little bit reading-challenged. Then, when Cheyenne Jackson and Fortune Feimster showed up, it was time for Ru’s girls to play cops and scene-stealers. But whose improv left a lasting impression in Drag Race Season 11 Episode 9 “L.A.D.P.”?

The Library Is Open

Contemplating her own shortcomings:
SILKY: One thing I’m going to say about me is I’m going to be wrong but I’m going to be comedically wrong.

Reading Silky:
PLASTIQUE: Silky’s drag transformation is incredible. She goes from a busted looking man into just busted looking.

Reading Plastique:
YVIE: Plastique Tiara, thank God you named yourself for your beauty and not your personality because plastique bag just doesn’t have the same ring to it.

Reading Shuga:
BROOK: Shuga Cain, I’m redoing my fireplace and I’m short a brick. Can I borrow your face?

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Out on the Streets

Removing an iron from Shuga’s derriere:
CHEYENNE: Ma’am, does this iron belong to you?
SILKY: No, it belongs to the Holiday Inn.

While bending over nude:
BROOK: I’m not ashamed of my body. Are you ashamed of my body?
FORTUNE: I definitely am ashamed.

While caressing Fortune’s hair:
BROOK: Ooh, you smell good. You smell like my dad.

When asked if she has alcohol:
BROOK: Oh, I don’t drink. I am a level four vegan.
FORTUNE: What’s a level four vegan?
BROOK: I eat nothing that casts a shadow…

Brooke opens her legs wide:
NINA: Holy Moses, that is a parting of the red sea!
BROOK: This is my lady garden, and I am not ashamed.
NINA: I call her Paula and I keep her hidden.

The Facekini Runway

Spotting Nina West’s Leigh Bowery-inspired lewk:
MICHELLE: Her name is Dot, and her favorite dance is the polka.

Critiquing Miss Vanjie’s sex shop lewk:
MICHELLE: You’re wearing a pair of pants that have a stirrup.
MISS VANJIE: Who dat is?

Critiquing Plastique’s kitty performance:
CHEYENNE: In the improv, when I asked you to do that sobriety test, and you did it, but you also added that cooter slam? It was awesome. Can you say that?
RUPAUL: I hope so. I want to say it. Cooter slam!

Have you missed any of this season’s best lines? Snatch our picks from: Episode 8, Episode 7, Episode 6, Episode 5, Episode 4, Episode 3, Episode 2 and Episode 1.

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